The Humdrum Express - Lookalike Bond

 

  The Humdrum Express, aka Kidderminster based wry observationalist Ian Passey, previously graced Just Some Punk Songs with a song from last year's The Day My Career Died album ( http://justsomepunksongs.blogspot.co.uk/2016/08/the-humdrum-express-leopard-print-onesie.html ). Today he returns with the title track of his new ep.

  The ep is titled Lookalike Bond and is available now :  http://thehumdrumexpress.bigcartel.com/product/lookalike-bond-ep

  As well as the title track's humerous look at celebrity culture and the business of celebrity lookalikes the ep also features a cover of Television Personalities' Painting By Numbers and songs called If Only I'd Watched Blue Peter and Fading Stars On Social Media. Imagine Half Man Half Biscuit with less bile; one man, his acoustic guitar and a sense of humour.

  Here's the excellent video for Lookalike Bond.....

 Not one to stand out from the crowd, an average man on the street
I have to work long hours, but still can’t seem to make ends meet
People have always said I resemble an actor on TV 
I don’t quite know how I ended up joining a look-alike agency

The work was steady, with the opening of a sports shop and a bar
Hardly an insight into what it must be like to be a star
Until one morning, I awoke to find an unexpected twist
My double was named as the next James Bond, and overnight became ‘A’ list

My name’s Bond – well, they say dead ringer
My name’s Bond
My name’s Bond – You only live twice, Goldfinger
My name’s Bond… James lookalike Bond

I forged signatures in Cannes; when I was there to see the sights
Seemed a far cry from switching on some village Christmas lights
Factory hours, now even more a distant memory
Former workmates, I hear, are passing comment jealously

My name’s Bond – I’m so well dressed, exuding charm
My Name’s Bond
My name’s Bond – with a wannabe Honor Blackman on my arm
My name’s Bond… James lookalike Bond


I turned on the TV news, left me shaken not stirred
As the (money) penny dropped, my whole world crashed by what I heard
My doppelganger, is not all he’s cracked up to be
I’ll admit… it scared the living daylights out of me!

His list of crime seems endless, he’s facing 007 years inside
The press are out to get him, my high life’s on the slide
The public are alleging other serious matters
I think I’ll have to sue – my career’s in tatters!

My name’s Bond – The novelty’s wearing thin
My name’s Bond
My name’s Bond – At the mercy of my famous twin
My name’s Bond, James Lookalike Bond

I was tempted by the taste of celebrity and wealth – 
Fooled into thinking I’d be bettering myself
A small crumb of comfort to ease my loss of earning
Is the hangers-on have gone; and I doubt they’ll be returning
Fame based on looks, I won’t be such a fool again
But I felt I needed something to help to ease the pain
I sought medical advice in a bid to ease my woe
My GP said “sit down, Bond” - I said “Dr, NO!”

I’m not Bond – Forget the man I used to be
I’m not Bond
I’m not Bond – Must be someone else who looks like me…